Stop ignoring the existence of LGBTQ+ people

While representation does come in many forms–celebrities, television shows, and even teachers–the media still has a huge lack of LGBTQ+ visibility.

With an increasing number of celebrities in the media expressing their LGBTQ+ identity to the public, the question of why coming out is so important is being raised more and more. Often, people who do not go through the process themselves misunderstand the point–even to the extent of getting angry when people make a “big deal” of their coming out. This harmful viewpoint comes from a lack of education and a lack of empathy for people in a situation that they are not in.

While people in the LGBTQ+ community would love to have equality in this world regardless of gender identity, sexuality, color, or class, the reality is that this equality does not yet exist. And because of this imbalance, an LGBTQ+ person has different experiences in life than someone who does not fall into this category. This is just like how people of color have different experiences in life than those who are not of color. They experience different discrimination, different culture, and have an overall different context surrounding their lives.

The different context that people come from shape their story. The context in which someone lives validates and explains actions they may take in certain situations. You can’t take context away from different experiences and expect to compare them equally.

For example, take these two students into consideration. One has transportation to school every day, has help at home while doing homework, and can afford all materials needed for learning. Comparing the grades of this student to another whose first priority is providing food and shelter for their families, who can’t afford supplies, and who does not have transportation to school is obviously unfair. The context that these two theoretical students come from is completely different, and therefore these people have very different experiences in life because of this context.

Likewise, comparing the experiences of “coming out” between a straight and an LGBTQ+ person is problematic because of the context surrounding those situations. When straight people argue that coming out shouldn’t be a big deal–especially in the media–simply because they didn’t come out expressing that they are straight, they are stripping the entire process of context.

Firstly, coming out is an extremely personal process, and speculating that it isn’t a big deal is ignoring the internal and external struggle of the person coming out. Secondly, representation in the media for LGBTQ+ people, especially people of color and those in the middle of the spectrum, is extremely limited. So when someone in the public eye comes out publicly, representation for that identity becomes more visible.

Limited representation is the cause of marginalization within communities. When people use stereotypes to generalize an entire community, those who don’t fit into that stereotype can be overlooked and viewed as invalid.

People can’t help but stereotype others and put them into groups. It’s how the human race simplifies the social world, like a way of classification. However, when you use your classification as the definitive label for a group and overly generalize, then it becomes hurtful.

Tyler Oakley, a popular YouTuber who identifies as gay, encounters hate every single day online. A comment in particular that he receives a lot is that he exaggerates his stereotypically gay characteristics in order to get views on his videos. At first, Oakley was defensive and even offended that people thought he fit into stereotypes.

He then wondered if his refusal to acknowledge his stereotypical tendencies was some sort of internalized homophobia, “a conscious, last-ditch effort to tell [himself] that [he] had been blending in all along.”

No one person can represent an entire community, no matter what community it is. While people should be encouraged to live the way they please and not be restricted by a label or stereotype, it’s okay if you do fit into some. After all, labels can help people find community and support. Representation helps people feel validated.

“In every community, some people will fit every stereotype, and some people will fit no stereotypes, and both are valid representations for that community,” Oakley said.

When celebrities and other public figures come out, they are not only allowing themselves to live a more open life, but are also adding another perspective that the people at home feeling alone can look up to and identify with. This is what makes coming out “such a big deal.”